THE CURRENT MONSTER PRESIDENT
WOULD LIKE A SECOND TERM.
HE SAYS THAT HE DESERVES IT
‘CAUSE ON CRIME HE’S VERY FIRM.

HE’S MAKING LOTS OF PROMISES
OF GOOD THINGS YET TO COME.
SOME MONSTERS ARE IMPRESSED BY HIM,
BUT OTHERS THINK HE’S DUMB.

THE CHALLENGER IS POLISHED,
SAYS THE PRESIDENT’S A DORK.
HE GETS THE PREZ SO MAD AT TIMES,
HE ALMOST POPS HIS CORK.

HE’S TELLING ALL THE MONSTERS
ALL THE THINGS THEY WANT TO HEAR.
THEY LISTEN VERY CAREFULLY,
AND THEN BREAK OUT IN CHEER.

THE PREZ IS IN HIS AIRPLANE
AND HE CALLS IT MONSTER ONE.
HE CIRCLES ‘ROUND THE NATION
FROM THE DAWN TILL DAY IS DONE.

YOU KNOW WHEN HE IS COMING,
‘CAUSE YOU HEAR HIS ENGINE HUM.
THE SIGN HE PULLS BEHIND HIM
SAYS “THE CHALLENGER’S A BUM.”

THE CHALLENGER GETS AIRSICK,
SO HE ALWAYS DRIVES A BUS.
“THE PRESIDENT’S A SNOB,’” HE SAYS
“HE’S NOT LIKE ONE OF US.”

“HE DOESN’T LIKE McBURGERS,
AND HE DOESN’T EAT McFRIES.
HE’D RATHER EAT HIS CAVIAR
UP IN THE FRIENDLY SKIES.”

“EXCUSE ME MR. PRESIDENT,”
THE ACE REPORTER SAID.
“I HEAR YOU’VE GOT A GIRLFRIEND
AND SHE’S MESSING WITH YOUR HEAD.”

“YOU SEE I HAVE THIS PICTURE,
IS THAT NOT YOU STANDING THERE?
MAKING ALL THOSE GOO GOO EYES
AND FUSSING WITH HER HAIR?”

“NOW LET ME SEE,” THE PREZ REPLIED,
THIS MUST BE A MISTAKE.
IT SURE DOES LOOK JUST LIKE ME,
BUT I SWEAR IT IS A FAKE.”

“I DON’T BLAME YOU FOR ASKING
THEN THE PRESIDENT REMARKED.
YOU CANNOT BE TOO CAREFUL
WHERE YOU KEEP YOUR AIRPLANE PARKED.”

“I MUST AGREE,” REPORTER SAID,
“YOU SEE I KNOW IT IS TRUE.
‘CAUSE WHILE OUT THERE ON THE RANCH
I CAUGHT A GLIMPSE OF YOU.

THE WINDOW SHADES WERE DOWN
BUT THERE WERE SHADOWS POKING THROUGH,
I SNUCK UP WITH MY CAMERA
TO GET A BETTER VIEW.”